What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
