meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
