Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
