Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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