Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
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