wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
