dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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