I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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