Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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