So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize