Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
