But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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