sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Randomize