dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
