Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
