problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
