so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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