32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
