But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize