$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
