yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
