Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
