Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
