I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
