does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
