Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
