You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Do vagina's smell?
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Randomize
