She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
