Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
