i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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