They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
