Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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