He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
