I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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