so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
