My underwear smells like fireworks.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Randomize
