Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
