we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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