fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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