Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize