The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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