ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
