I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Randomize