I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
