She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
