U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Randomize
