i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
