sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
