I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize