i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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