Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Randomize
